rodneykong:

ghostgif:

98% of divorces are caused by Mario Party 

yes your honor, this marriage can no longer work out after the trauma I suffered from my wife stealing not one, but TWO of my stars

(via iwishihadafather)

veggietalesyaoi:

if tumblrcon was a thing someone would literally get killed there im not even joking

(via iwishihadafather)

lynzave:

geezjenner:

lynzave:

I’m legitimately amazed at the fact that women can actually grow a person in their uterus without even trying

and then the people CRAWL OUT OF THEIR VAGINA

COVERED IN ECTOPLASM 

AND NO ONE EVEN TRIES TO KILL IT LIKE THAT’S A COMPLETELY NORMAL OCCURRENCE FOR US

I don’t think the person writing this realizes that they crawled out of a uterus once

I was a C section check your privilege

(via neverforthefall)

iwishihadafather:

when did this

become hotter than this

(via the-voyagehome)

ifyoucarryonthisway:

i need a job where i work one hour a week and i get paid a thousand dollars a minute 

(via lovelydancemoms)

nishlo:

I might be bad (at everything) but I’m perfectly good at it

(via iwishihadafather)